How To Train An Iron Dragon

What would I have been if destiny followed my will?

Living a simple life has always been my dream. Though we were not as filthy rich as some of our relatives were,  I was pretty contented with the simple but comfortable life I enjoy. Since I was living a simple life, it definitely is no wonder why I have created simple dreams for the future. Dreams that are as bright as the sun but not as high as the clouds in the sky.

Since I was nurtured in unconditional love, I was raised to believe by my Dad and Grandma that every person is kind. If ever somebody becomes harsh or does something wrong to me, I should show them kindness and then they will be kind to me as well.

Stepping out of my home, my comfort zone for six years, I was made to realize that life is not everything nice. It is a battle, and kindness is not a preferable weapon to survive. Since I was fat and dark, I have been the subject of mockery. I have been called names, teased to death, but I was afraid to fight because I was not raised that way.

But then, a turning point came in my life came before college which made me realize to finally clench my open fist. Not only was my heart shattered into pieces, it was killed. I have never felt so low and inferior in my life. 

I suddenly found myself in a new persona. My heart beats but today, it doesn't have as much grace and mercy as it has before. I suddenly never became contented being second great. I was no longer afraid to exude my prowess tot he world. I was suddenly a new man- free from inhibitions, strong, incorruptible, uncompromising, and ALWAYS on a fighting stance. The boy who usually cries when he is teased no longer shows his tears. He who used to suppress his feelings not to hurt others suddenly became tactless and unstoppable.

The tiger was gone, and an iron dragon was born. Suddenly, I have never became afraid to succeed in my endeavors in life. Suddenly, I was no longer afraid to face my enemies, whether they be upfront or in camouflage. Suddenly, I was no longer downplaying my capabilities in efforts to look humble and level my achievements with contemporaries.

Unlike a tiger who moves fast but is unable to reach for the stars, I found myself already open to life's options. I welcomed bigger dreams, because I lost my fear of dreaming big in the first place. My usual tagline "If it's meant to be, then it will be", suddenly became "Everything I need comes to me". 

Today, here I am. A productive writer and a contented person. I now understand why there are unworthy people and irrevocable mistakes I have committed. I needed it to become tougher to prepare myself for the Lord's greatest blessings: some I already enjoy, some yet to come, and some I'm still praying for.

Right this afternoon, I realized that I attribute my success a particular person who pushed me over the edge, and led me to stand where I am today. And I think it's way much better compared to my old dream of being a high school teacher like my Dad, married, with a bigger belly (than what I have today), enlightening my students' gibberish qualms at daytime and playing with a bunch of kids at home at night, still be the same old foolishly kind, gullible, soft-hearted man who would run to his grandmama's saya when threatened.

Destiny indeed has other plans. It did not make my life picture perfect like how I visioned it to be, but then again I say, thank God it didn't happen.